HEY

so I haven't posted in forever. I haven't had alot to say. Lots of people have been doing the talking and what they've had to say was more encouraging and like idk better then what has been on my mind.

A friend of mine lost his older brother about 2 weeks ago and I can't even imagine what that would be like. So for that family be praying. Their names are not important but pray. "the Lord is close to the broken hearted, He heals those who are crushed in Spirit. " Death does not make sense and there is nothing to make it better. Just try and remember that they are home, their forever home with their forever Jesus, for reals.

There has been kinda alot going on. I dont really know where to start. I'm kinda procrastinating right now so there may be a few posts. Its christmas time and sarah and I have decorated the room. Its beautiful. :) I love this time of year.

I love love love getting gifts for people, like seriously. I can't wait for my sister to open her Christmas present, she's gonna flip out. and so is her husband cause I'm giving him an awesome pic of his wife all framed and pretty ( he doesn't read this so I'm allowed to say). hahah.

Its weird coming back here after bein home but this past couple weeks have been really good in regards to friends here. Sarah and I have been getting along so well and like i've been loving hanging out with friends.

I'm still kinda not like open though. I do this like every winter. I get really hard and annoyed and cynnical to like everything. I am not feeling that amazing like overwhelming feeling where you are just like 100% in love with Jesus. I want to and I'm clinging to what I know. Its not a doubt thing. Its like in Screwtape letters, he talks about peaaks and troughs. I'm in a trough right now and I'm trying to be open to those around me not in that same place. I'm trying to be supportive and not critical. Its tough. haha oh well such is life. I'm learning