I Miss

Today, I miss Africa, so much. One of my friends who is a nurse just got back from Tenwek (the Mission Hospital in Bomet, Kenya I worked at for 2 weeks last november).
She told me she saw my little girl, the one who's hand is pictured in my first post and who's face is in the second or third. Rebecaa ( my friend) told me she is healthy and her mother brought her back for a check up with the American Heart team to make sure she was healthy. This was so exciting because it means that her mother cares enough to bring her back, most mothers of a Downs Syndrom Children in Kenya reject their children so it was exciting.I still miss her though. Today my heart just aches to be there with those children. Today I feel like college is not for me and like classes are so not important because Africa wants me, although I need it more than it needs me. But here's the thing, God has me here, I love it here. I love my friends and I know I will be back its just one of those days.
I was thinking the other day about something that happened a few days after I returned from Kenya. I was rehersing on stage for this big show called ARTWORKS and in the middle of my song (You've GOt a friend" -Carol King) I burst into tears. I sat down on the end of the stage and bawled, like a 3 year old who just scraped her knee. Like, cried and cried and cried. Yes I was Jet Lagged and yes i was terrified of performing with with the people I was with cause they're amazing and I'm not even remotely as confident as I seem. I was thinking about this the other day, I just couldn't stop crying. My best friend came home with me that night and she just kept asking "whats wrong, are you sure you're ok, like talk to me whats up?" I realized the other day that I was processing through everything, like while i was in Africa I was so focussed on working and just like being there I didn't process. Ok just had to get that moment out of my head.
I"ll probly write another post in ten minutes or something there is alot in my head today :)
much love!


"He's Gonna meet me where the Mountain Beets ME
and Carry me Through"
this Dave Barnes song came on while i was writing I thought it was so APT.